forever alone

HELLO.

Gonna break out the champagne because the plane didn't crash in the Golden Triangle.


My friend was talking about this guy that had a deal with him on Thursday since I wasn't around. We'll call the guy Ronery. Rizal is my friend. They had lunch and Ronery said he wanted to order more food so he went out to get more rice, Rizal usually suffers from severe ADHD (like Lotty-sama, another of my good friends but more Swedish) and we always believed he was mentally retarded. Rizal got tired of waiting and took Ronery's cellphone to look at his pic folder because he was bored. He realized that all the text messages on his customer's phone were all the same. They all belonged to Ronery himself. Rizal restrained himself from blacking out because of the fail. He had to email me.

"Guy txts to himself. Totally not shitting you. *X-FILES MUSIC*"

I laughed in the airport because I'm stupid and easily amused. Sorry.

Ronery then sent 7 text messages to me on Friday. I didn't answer them because it was fucking creepy in a sad and deluded way. (FUCK YOU RIZAL FOR GIVING OUT MY NUMBER LOLOLOL). Thank god it was only the number for my public phone.

I checked the other messages. Two of those were addressed to another girl.. wth.

"Hey Aria grl, jom minum nak?" (Translation: Hey Aria, do you want to drink?)
"Weiiii call me, Ari "

I thought maybe he sent 7 messages to the wrong person but I saw my name on the others too. He gmailed me. There was also a huge emo poem which he sent to me, reading it gave me goosebumps because it was so cheesy and corny.

"Wassup. Where are you now? "

"Vietnam."

"Huh. Where?"

I sent him a map of Vietnam.


He replied with
"???? Eh, wanna go for a drink? "

I can't reply because my hands were glued to my face for two hours after reading that. I always run into the funniest folk, my life is a glorious chain of wtf moments and 15% of my life is spent facepalming.

If I ever meet him for a deal, I will accidentally spill hot coffee all over him. Like UGHGDJH DURR OOOOOPPPS I HAVE THE DEXTERITY OF A DYING WHALE TODAY HURRRRRRRRRRRRR SORRY then run away so I can get hit by a car.

Oh and I come from a sullen third world country, no Halloween for us so we went to a club for some drinks. Too many rapists in Malaysia, no trick or treating. I hope you guys celebrated it in some way or something. Eat lots of candy and get cardiac arrest in the name of those that you love. <3